Between discipline and improvisation, organisation and freedom, this article explores how to find personal balance in a world shaped by AI, social media, digital work and social relationships.
So, do we need to organise ourselves, or should we do everything by instinct?
It is a big question.
I think there is a logical part, and then a more instinctive or emotional part. On one side, we may want everything to be perfect, organised, tidy, clean and planned in advance.
On the other side, we may want to improvise, let life guide us and, as I like to say, simply let things flow.
We could almost oppose two extremes.
On one side, perfection in organisation.
On the other, pure instinct: I do not necessarily plan everything, I watch how things evolve and I adapt.
But is one of these two solutions really better than the other?
I think that is precisely the problem: looking only for one or only for the other risks making us lose a form of balance.
Not Everyone Has Learned How to Organise Themselves
There are people who do not know how to organise themselves, who have never really learned to do so, or who simply do not take the time to organise themselves.
And today, with a phone, a computer, the Internet, social media and all the possibilities offered by modern societies, we can quickly feel lost.
Of course, there are much more important problems.
Even in a country such as France, some people struggle to have a roof over their head, enough to eat or simply enough to live properly.
There is also the question of meeting people, social life, true friends and the people around us.
So before even talking about perfect organisation, I think we need to return to a certain foundation.
That foundation includes family, friends, the people around us, possibly work colleagues, but also the way we use what we have and the way we behave with others.
Our Societies Are Very Connected, But Are We Really Closer?
There is something that makes me think a great deal about modern societies.
We are extremely connected technologically.
And yet we can see many people walking with their phone, their earphones, TikTok, YouTube Shorts or other content, without necessarily speaking to the people around them.
When you speak to someone, you can sometimes even feel that it almost looks more like a confrontation than a social encounter.
I am deliberately exaggerating the idea.
Modern societies also have many positive aspects.
We have roads, rules, laws, different forms of safety and a whole collective organisation.
Even when a person feels isolated, they do not live completely alone in the world.
In a way, we are all interconnected.
And that is also what makes me think that we can sometimes accept letting things flow.
Not everything depends only on us.
Organisation Does Not Solve Every Problem
You can organise yourself intensely: that will not remove every problem.
Whether we are rich or poor, everyone faces different difficulties.
That is obviously a very basic observation, but it mainly shows that perfection does not exist, even if we try every day to stay on a good path.
We can try to find security in our life, our housing, our food, our work, our relationships and our future.
That is important.
But beyond this security, each person also looks for their own forms of fulfilment and happiness.
And I do not think there is one single definition of happiness that applies to everyone.
There are different forms of happiness depending on people, the periods of their life and what they truly want to build.
So the question returns:
When should we organise ourselves, and when can we let things flow?
When a Certain Stability Has Been Reached, We Can Sometimes Ease the Pressure
I would say first that when we have a relatively stable situation, we can probably allow ourselves more room to let things evolve by themselves.
For example, when we have relatively stable income, enough to live on, perhaps a family, and the possibility of looking towards the future with a certain level of security.
That obviously does not mean problems disappear.
There may be stress at work, family pressure, relationship problems or a whole set of everyday difficulties.
But when the foundations are solid enough, we can sometimes accept not controlling everything.
And then there is also our free time.
Do we always want to use it to work, learn and progress?
Or can we also relax, watch something, discover new things and simply change our mind?
Here again, I think we need to find a balance.
Do We Always Have to Be Productive?
Today, there is a great deal of talk about productivity.
We have to be disciplined.
We have to work.
We have to progress.
We have to stop procrastinating.
But I do not think life is that simple.
Of course there are moments when we need to work seriously.
But there are also moments when we need to detach ourselves from what we are doing.
Sometimes, we need a real “reset”.
That means temporarily stopping thinking about our current problems, doing something completely different and trying to think differently.
We may even need to take some distance from the news.
Because the news can also become extremely heavy to bear.
What Attracts Our Attention Is Not Necessarily What Is Good for Us
On the Internet or on television, what shocks people often attracts a lot of attention.
In marketing, people talk a great deal about virality.
Basically, what becomes viral is what spreads widely from one person to another.
But what is extremely popular is not automatically what is most useful or most enriching.
This is also a criticism I can make of some uses of computing and entertainment.
Many very popular pieces of content are violent, shocking or simply designed to capture our attention.
So what choice is left?
Either “getting bored” by studying?
Or entertaining ourselves only with something shocking?
I think there is still a much more interesting balance to find between the two.
Distraction can also be intelligent, cultural, social or simply pleasant.
In a Relationship, You Also Need to Meet the Other Person Where They Are
This reminds me of a chess game I played with someone several years ago.
That person was much stronger than me.
During the game, they explained an advanced technique to me, notably to protect the king with several pieces.
The problem was not that the technique was among the best at a high level.
The problem was that their level was so much higher than mine that their explanation did not really match what I needed at that moment.
And I think we find exactly the same thing in social relationships.
Meeting someone at their level does not mean lowering standards.
It also does not mean pretending to be less competent.
It simply means understanding who you are speaking to.
If you try to demonstrate power in front of someone who knows absolutely nothing about the subject you are discussing, what is the point?
In my view, not much.
There is no longer a real exchange.
The Same Problem Exists in Marketing
We also find this problem in prospecting and marketing.
You go on social media and you can receive many proposals: a new training course, a new school, a new opportunity, network marketing, coaching, a service, and so on.
Everyone is trying to sell something.
But are we really trying to know the person before selling them an opportunity?
In prospecting, people rightly talk about qualification.
That means trying to understand where the person really is in their own life.
What are their real problems?
What means do they have?
What tools do they have?
What knowledge do they have?
Where are they today?
And in relation to my experience and what I offer, where can I genuinely take them?
If we do not try to understand the person and simply want to sell what we have already decided to sell, without a relationship or a real exchange, I think we miss an essential part of marketing.
Too Much Organisation Can Also Trap Us
This is where we return to our starting question.
Because organisation can also become excessive.
Imagine that you have prepared an extremely detailed project for the next three months, six months, five years or ten years.
Today, with artificial intelligence, we can also prepare very structured plans extremely quickly.
You can ask for a detailed project plan and decide:
“That is it. This is exactly what I am going to do, and I will not change anything.”
The problem is that by absolutely wanting to respect your plan, you can also become closed to opportunities.
We could say that organisation gives a framework.
But a framework can also become a prison if we systematically refuse to look at what is happening around us.
So we also need to keep an open mind, a view of our environment and of the wider world.
But Absolute Open-Mindedness Can Also Be a Problem
And here again, we can fall into the opposite excess.
Being open-minded does not mean speaking to absolutely everyone, accepting absolutely everything or never thinking about risks.
We have all received an education, good or bad depending on situations and points of view.
Our parents, the people around us, our past and our experiences have played a role in who we are today.
Then we gradually take our own responsibility.
The past influences what we live today.
And what we do today will inevitably have consequences for part of our future.
So trusting life entirely by saying, “I am not going to plan anything, everything will necessarily be fine,” seems to me as excessive as wanting to control everything.
The Right Moment to Let Things Flow
For me, there is one moment in particular when we can let things flow more: when we have just achieved a result.
You have worked.
You have won a victory.
You have reached a certain level.
You have just accomplished something you are proud of.
Why not enjoy that moment a little?
We can congratulate ourselves.
We can breathe.
We can relax.
We can let an evening or a day pass without immediately asking what the next objective will be.
But then the night passes.
The next day arrives.
And we generally need to continue on the path we have set for ourselves.
Perhaps that, in the end, is balance.
Artificial Intelligence Can Speed Up Organisation, Not Necessarily Results
There is also something new today with artificial intelligence.
A phase of organisation can become extremely fast.
We can prepare a project, structure ideas, create a calendar, set priorities or think about several years of work much faster than before.
But making a plan is not accomplishing the plan.
Achieving results will always require something else.
Discipline.
Effort.
Social relationships.
Open-mindedness.
Adaptation.
And probably a certain stability in life.
We can spend three hours, three days or three weeks thinking about a plan that will then determine one year, two years or even ten years of work.
But simply thinking about it does not mean it will happen.
It is daily effort that gradually produces results.
It Is Not Only About Mindset
I am also quite critical of the idea that everything depends only on our mindset.
Of course our state of mind is important.
But we live in an interdependent world.
There are external conditions.
There are other influential people.
There are opportunities and problems that we do not entirely control.
And there is also an element of chance.
We can prepare many things, but not everything will necessarily happen as planned.
Order and Disorder: An Idea That Has Always Interested Me
Chaos theory has always interested me.
What I mainly retain from it in this reflection is the paradoxical idea that order and disorder can end up coexisting.
We can want to create a great deal of order and still produce unexpected consequences.
And conversely, a situation that appears disordered can sometimes gradually reveal a new form of organisation.
I do not claim here to give a complete scientific definition of chaos theory.
I am mainly talking about the way this idea helps me think about everyday life.
The more we try to organise everything and be extremely disciplined, the more we can sometimes indirectly create other significant problems.
But the more we completely abandon organisation simply to distract ourselves, forget our problems and endure events, the more we also risk creating other difficulties.
In both cases, perfection does not exist.
There Are Times to Act and Others When It Is Better to Do Nothing
We find the same balance in many situations.
There are moments when we need to speak.
And then there are others when it is better to listen.
Some people speak a great deal, and that can eventually create problems.
Others almost never speak in order to avoid risks or avoid saying something foolish.
But here again, there is probably not one single right way to act.
It depends on the person’s character, the situation, their mood, their morale and the context.
There are moments when a person will be completely open to discussion.
And others when it will simply not be the right moment.
Knowing how to adapt is also part of balance.
Organising Yourself Without Seeking Perfection
So I think there is no perfection in pure organisation.
Wanting to be ultra-disciplined, plan everything and do everything perfectly in the hope of fully securing your future seems exaggerated to me.
But the opposite extreme seems just as problematic.
Constantly letting things flow and telling yourself that life will decide everything for you can become passivity.
Life is complex.
There are things we need to fight within ourselves.
There are also difficulties we need to face in the outside world.
And sometimes, we simply need to accept that we cannot control everything at a given moment.
Finding Your Own Balance
In the end, I think I have summed up the idea.
There are moments when it is better to let things flow.
And then there are moments when we need to try to organise ourselves.
We need to find a balance between the moment when we work and the moment when we relax, between discipline and improvisation, between action and listening, between framework, focus and open-mindedness.
Organising ourselves too much can become a prison.
Never organising ourselves can prevent us from moving forward.
And whatever we do, we will always encounter problems.
So the aim may not be to build a life in which no problem exists.
The aim is rather to know when to act, when to think, when to persevere and when simply to let life follow its course for a while.
And if we are looking for our own happiness, I also think we need to wish for a certain form of happiness around us.
That is it.
For me, balance is probably somewhere between these two ideas: building enough order to move forward, while leaving enough freedom to continue living.
José DUTIAN